Feeling Sad

Sometimes it is hard to just swallow the sad feelings I have and get on with the day.  This morning I woke up very sad and I think it is more than just what I have been going through.  I don't know if it was a dream I had and even though I don't remember the dream, the feelings remained, or if it was something else that happened to make me feel that way.  I know there are plenty of people that deal with sadness on a daily basis, I am not claiming to be the only one, and I wonder how they do it?  Is it something you just "deal" with and move on, or is it something you can work through and end up feeling better about?

Just one of those days

I woke up this morning and had one of those days.  You know, when you don't want to say or do anything bad, just want to have a good day?  You end up sticking your foot in your mouth though and the good day that you thought you were going to have ends up turning out to be sour.  It's like for the rest of the day all you want to do is hurry home and jump into bed with the hopes that tomorrow won't be so bad.  Yep, had that.  Maybe tomorrow will be better...

Black Roses.......beautiful

I have always loved black roses and although they are not natural, it is still one of the most beautiful roses I have ever seen.  Most people associate them with death and yes it is true but they can also mean new beginnigs and rebirth.  Sometimes the darkest red roses are called 'black roses' and while they do symbolize the death of an idea or say farewell they can send a positive message of rebirth and new beginnings.  Pretty cool eh?? Black roses are also associated with goths, vampires, really anything that most people would see as evil.  Not so. 

Here is a great website that gives insight into more than just the meaning of death for these beautiful and rare roses.  http://www.helium.com/items/1177844-meaning-black-rose

Yeah....I have had days like this...

Could get lost in books

I try and do as much reading as I can. Key word try. I sit down and begin books and then halfway through them I see another and want to read that one. You would think I would have learned by now that I should finish one before starting another....nope....and the more I keep telling myself that, the more it doesn't happen. I love any kind of book-well almost. I am not too keen on song books or languages that I can't understand, but you get the point.

I often wonder what it must be like to have the kind of job where you just review books all day long and then submit reviews for them....I would absolutely love to do something like that....escape from this world for so many hours a day and then once that is complete, then start on another.....that would be awesome....

It feels as though life is passing me by and all I can do is stare as it does.  I am sure everyone from time to time hates what they do or where they are in life, but sometimes it is so overwhelming that I could scream.  Life is too short people say, don't worry yourself to death others say, but still it doesn't help.  There are times where I just wish things were different.  Who knows, perhaps tomorrow things will be.

This morning I felt like I couldn't care less if I got out of bed or not.  So what if I had work to do?  So what if there were bills that needed to be paid, or anything else for that matter.  I just wanted to remain where I was and forget about everything.  Course, that wasn't possible, but for the briefest moment I felt like it could be.  That all I had to do was just close my eyes and everything would disappear.  There wouldn't be anything to do or to think about or even to feel obligated to do.

Life isn't like that though and the more a person dreams and wishes it were true, it just isn't.  Will I ever find peace in this chaos?  Who knows, but until then I will just have to suck it up and get up in the morning regardless of how I feel.  Easier said than done, but that is the way it goes.